![A woman sits on a couch with her husband, comforting him after and argument. Don't let your spouse make you angry. When you feel strong emotion (a reaction), slow down and decide what to do next (a response).](https://www.focusonthefamily.com/wp-content/uploads/2024/07/dont-let-spouse-make-your-angry-shutterstock-2366029581-668582fab45db-300x200.webp)
Don’t Let Your Spouse Make You Angry
No one-including our spouse-can control the way you feel. The next time you react emotionally or in anger, take a step back and acknowledge that while the emotion is real, how you respond to it is up to you.
Here are eight ideas to calm your child.
Your child is yelling, slamming doors and having an all-out tantrum … but can he trust you with his anger? Punishing the behaviors associated with anger might be a quick fix, but without instruction your child will lose out. National anger management trainer Bob Bowen warns that children who never learn proper ways to express their frustration will eventually find their own, often inappropriate, methods.
“At 7 years old she may be yelling or pulling someone’s hair, but by age 16 she will have developed 15 other incorrect ways to say ‘I’m frustrated.’ She has to find her own path because, as parents, we haven’t given her the correct one.”
The road to teaching proper “anger behavior” can be extremely bumpy when parents are sucked into the heat of the moment. Parents need first to handle their own emotions.
“When a child sees a parent managing his own frustration and anger, he will learn by example,” Bowen says. “How a parent responds to his child’s anger is how the parent teaches.”
Teaching discipline instead of punishing the child equips him with anger management tools that can be used the rest of his life. Here are eight things you can do to help your child learn how to express his anger positively.
Copyright © 2005 Focus on the Family. All rights reserved. International copyright secured.
Lynne Thompson is a public speaker and a writer who has published more than 300 magazine articles. She is also author of The Official Soccer Mom Devotional and a contributing author to several books including Chicken Soup to Inspire a Woman’s Soul and Stories from a Soldier’s Heart. Lynne is regularly featured on Focus on the Family’s Weekend Magazine broadcast as “The Soccer Mom.” She and her husband, Pete, reside in California with their two kids.
No one-including our spouse-can control the way you feel. The next time you react emotionally or in anger, take a step back and acknowledge that while the emotion is real, how you respond to it is up to you.
How do you repair the relationship when you have an angry outburst at your spouse? Read on to learn more about controlling your reactions.
Kintsugi is the art of repairing something that has been broken with gold, with the understanding that the object is more beautiful because it has been broken. Like the art of kintsugi, God repairs the brokenness in our lives and makes us more beautiful through the process.