As soon as grandchildren are old enough to talk, they begin asking questions. A lot of questions. And they lob those questions at us with a pace that can be tiring, if not totally overwhelming. The role of grandparents depends on learning to listen and communicate throughout our grandchildren’s questions.
We’ll unpack the gold hidden in these questions in just a moment, and we’ll see how they can position us to be relevant in our grandchildren’s lives for years to come.
But first I’ll share a tip that can preserve our sanity throughout our grandchildren’s Q&A games. It reminds us to breathe and to remember that not all questions are created equally.
The Role of Grandparents Requires Listening and Communication
One day, I had an epiphany about my first grandchild’s endless interrogations. Emerson was an itty-bitty thing riding in my car. As was her custom, she was happily peppering me with questions about anything, everything, and nothing. I suddenly realized it wasn’t the answers Emerson was interested in. But the conversation!
It came as a relief when it dawned on me that Emerson didn’t really want to know why the sky was blue. She simply enjoyed the back and forth of communicating. That one realization created our “Silly Question Game.”
I started it by answering Emerson’s next couple of questions with totally nonsensical explanations. Puzzled at first, Emerson caught on quickly and was soon sold on the ridiculous dialogue.
The “Silly Question Game” goes something like this:
“Keggie, why is the sky blue?”
“Because frogs like to hop.”
“But Keggie, why do frogs like to hop?”
“Because turtles have shells.”
I think you see the pattern. Clearly, my answers had nothing whatsoever to do with Emerson’s questions. Communication was everything, and the sillier the exchange the more we enjoyed it.
Emerson is now a preteen. As you might imagine we no longer play the “Silly Question Game,” but she and I both enjoy reliving the memory. It’s written into our story.
Learning to Listen and Communicate
Conversations with Emerson and the grandchildren who came after her have now changed. As you know, little ones’ queries change as they mature. They begin to ask questions that can be just as hard to answer as “Why do elephants have long noses?”
I think we can all agree our grandchildren ask questions we can’t and shouldn’t answer because the subject matter isn’t age appropriate or it’s just too difficult for them to understand. And there are also questions that only their parents should address.
But let’s be honest with ourselves. There are just as many other times when we put their questions off or give them a place-holding type of answer because we just don’t have the energy.
It’s why I highly recommend stopping to ask God to replenish our strength in our role as grandparents. Jesus is the well that never runs dry. As for me, I’m needy and I know it! I’m always asking the Lord to remind me when I’m trying to do anything in my own power, and He is faithful to do just that.
How to Answer Our Grandchildren’s Questions (Even When We Don’t Know the Answers)
Little kids ask endless questions because there is so much about their world they simply don’t know. They’re refreshingly honest about their ignorance.
Our grandchildren are always processing. They’re curious about everything, and they turn to us because they believe we have the answers.
Let’s think about what that means. Our role as grandparents means that we won’t always be our grandchildren’s go-to source for information. As they grow, so will their circles of influence. We all know we’re in a temporary season with our grandchildren.
How Well Do I Listen and Communicate?
Philippians 3:2-4 says, “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.”
When grandchildren ask us questions, we can look directly to their interests. Engaging in conversation may change over time, but your relationship can stay constant. Consider the following questions while reflecting on how well you listen and communicate.