Try these ideas to help teach your children the true nature of joy
The book of Psalms is full of joyful statements, often created amid difficult circumstances.
Although happiness and joy can be present at the same time, happiness is based on material things or events, such as when a person is given a gift, graduates from college or celebrates a birthday.
Joy, on the other hand, is from God and runs deeper — it can be present even during unhappy times. Do you have God’s joy?
What are you worth?
The world ascribes value to what people own — salary, wealth, power, appearance and fame. As a Christian, you are worthy because Jesus is worthy. God’s love has made you important to Him. Without having to prove yourself, you are free to enjoy your life, no matter your circumstances.
What is important to you?
How you spend your time — reading the Bible, praying, watching TV, playing video games — reveals what is important to you. Reevaluate your actions, and then find behaviors that will cause you to grow closer to God. Growing closer to God is a source of joy.
How big is your God?
When good things happen, you may give God credit for it. When bad things happen, you may feel God has turned His back on you. In Psalms, read how David turned toward God amid crises and was rewarded with joy. Joy comes from knowing God, enjoying what God has done for you and believing that He constantly cares for you.
Do you want your children to catch your joy?
The best way to teach joy is to demonstrate it. If you are obsessed with keeping dirt out of the house or buying things to fill rooms, your children will notice. In the same way, if His joy permeates your life, they will learn to be joyful through your example.
Romans 15:13
Nehemiah 8:10
Psalm 5:11, 21:6, 30:11, 118:24, 126:3
Proverbs 15:30
Isaiah 12:3, 51:11
John 16:24
Galatians 5:22-23.
Use a puppet and this skit to teach your child about joy.
Puppet: I give up! I can’t do it!
Parent: What’s the matter?
Puppet: I can’t keep smiling.
Parent: Why are you trying to smile?
Puppet: I want to be happy all the time!
Parent: Happiness comes and goes. It’s a feeling. Instead of trying to smile and be happy, why don’t you ask God for His joy?
Puppet: Will joy make me smile all the time?
Parent: No. You can have God’s joy when you smile and when you’re sad. It comes from knowing God loves you.
Puppet: How do I keep His joy even when bad things happen?
Parent: Pretend you’re upset because I won’t give you a cookie.
Puppet: That would upset me.
Parent: To feel God’s joy, think about one way God is good to you.
Puppet: God put me in this family so you can take care of me.
Parent: That’s right! Now pretend the rain has spoiled our family’s picnic.
Puppet: Plop! Plop! Plop! It’s raining. (Pause) God made puddles for me to splash.
Parent: Good. (Name of your child), can you help (name of puppet) and me come up with more reasons to say thank You to God? (Have puppet shout words of encouragement each time your child thanks God for something.)
Review
Teach your children about joy: Wrap small amounts of money in individual packages, and give one to each child. Encourage them to guess what’s inside. After they unwrap it, help them consider how they will use the money — tithe, save and spend. Then remind them to say thank you.
Explain how God gives people His joy — a daily offering. Ask children to look at joy as a gift.
Anticipate it. Discuss what kinds of gifts God wants to give them.
Unwrap it. Explain how prayer and reading the Bible are ways they can receive joy. Knowing that they are God’s children, that He loves them and that He wants what is best for them brings joy.
Use it. Joy is not happiness but can be in them at all times — during easy as well as difficult days. They can share it with others because God is the provider. Children can show joy through good attitudes, helpfulness and thankfulness.
Thank the Giver. Remind children to tell God “thank You” for daily giving them His joy.
Review
—Sheila Seifert
To teach your children about one aspect of joy, declare one Saturday as New Day. On this day, everything they do should be new. Instead of getting dressed the way they usually do, have them put on their clothing out of order or on backward. For breakfast, serve lunch, and then read them a bedtime story. Continually change things that happen in a normal day so that tweens are anticipating how they will complete their chores and other routine activities.
Some ideas for helping the day feel new to your kids are to walk backward, comb their hair with their arms interlocked, turn a book upside down and try to read it, eat breakfast foods for lunch, picnic at the side of the house, have a laughing contest during rest time, sing a song in reverse, enter the house only by the back door, etc. Perhaps set a timer, and every hour do something different together.
The next day, explain that God’s joy allows people to see everyday things in a new way and even enjoy activities that we don’t necessarily like. Remind them that they can have God’s joy in all they do because God’s love for them brings joy.
Review
—Sheila Seifert
The story of C.S. Lewis’ courtship and marriage to Joy Davidman was romanticized in the 1993 Oscar-nominated movie Shadowlands. The pair married in a civil ceremony in 1956 so Joy could keep her British residency; almost a year later, they held a church-sanctioned ceremony.
Lewis’ book Surprised by Joy was published in 1955, a year before his civil wedding and two years before his church-sanctioned ceremony. Only after the death of his wife and the publication of A Grief Observed did readers make the “Joy” connection between his wife and this book.
Surprised by Joy was not about Lewis’ spouse. It’s a spiritual biography about the nature of joy, which played a leading role in his conversion from atheism to Christianity. Lewis based the title on a William Wordsworth sonnet.
In his intellectual journey, Lewis expanded the concept of joy to capture and explain his inner longings for God that are universally experienced. He concluded that the reconnection to God and a glimpse of what is eternal exceeded everything else in life.
Review
Consider reading Surprised by Joy as a family to understand one man’s vulnerability to God’s joy. Even if you don’t, discuss the following with your teen:
—Sheila Seifert
Sheila Seifert is the editorial director of Brio and Focus on the Family magazine, the author of over 20 books and the founder of Simple Literature.
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